What not to say to a cop when he pulls you over

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
2. Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3 Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job
4. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.
5. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
6. Bad cop. No donut.
7. You're not going to check the trunk, are you?
8. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?
9. I pay your salary
10. Gee officer, that's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning.
11. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
12. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of me.
13. What do you mean have I been drinking? You are the trained specialist.